InsideTech

I'll start it off.

As I was jogging past the archery range, I got an arrow through my head!

How embarrassing! Everyone asked me how I was and I told then I was ok, that I have no brains anyway so it didn't hit anything vital. The only problem was how to remove the pesky arrow because my hat wouldn't fit properly anymore. Someone mentioned that I should just leave it in because if you remove it, then it will bleed more. So I left it in and drove myself to the hospital. I walked into the ER and they gave me some forms to fill out and asked me to be seated. Everyone in the ER was staring at me, probably because my hat wasn't fitting right. Finally, after 2 hours, a doctor came to see me and asked me to take off the arrow through the head gag. I said, doctor this is no gag! He said, Yeah, right, then lunged at me and ripped the arrow out of my head! Blood and brains were spouting everywhere so I put a finger in each hole on the side of my head to stop the bleeding. The doctor asked me to fill out one more form but when I reached for a pen, the hole spouted blood all over the doctor's face. Boy, was he mad!!! They brought me into surgery and quickly found bolts to match the holes in my head. They screwed them into my head and that stopped the bleeding. After surgery, as I was laying in my hospital bed, I asked the doctor if I would ever be able to wear my hat again. He said no but to think of the bright side. Now you can hang things from your bolts! Oh joy, I said. Upon my release, I hung my car keys on one bolt and my jacket on the other and skipped merrily out of the hospital and into the sunset.

Dear Barry,

I have noticed some discrepancies in your post.  First of all, you said that you have no brains.  Then, all of a sudden, you're leaking brains.  How is that possible?  Another thing: if you are skipping merrily off into the sunset, why do you have car keys?  Where is this car?  I thought you drove it to the hospital.  Are you just going to leave it there?  I'm just sayin'.

Sincerely,

Captain Obvious

:)

Dear Hawkeye, I mean, Paula,

The leaking brains were the brains that are in there for filler. I only use one brain cell, all the others are already dead from alcohol and drug abuse. When I say I'm down to my last brain cell, I'm NOT kidding! When I go skipping off merrilty into the sunset, I am carefree, foot loose and francy free. I'll be back for the car later. I'm sorry you missed the point of the story because you were nit picking about inconsistencies. You know me well enough to know that I have many...well....um....inconsistencies. The moral of the story, my fine looking, lady friend is that no matter how bad you've got it, make the best of it! Wasn't that obvious, Captain Obvious?

Respectfully,

My Last Brain Cell

Doh...

I don't think Paula is Psycho or a bitch MB, she was probaly trying to help you by getting rid of those dead brain cells to make more room for the one brain cell you have left! lol

I am so completely and totally sorry Paula! Please forgive me, I'm begging! Oh No not that!

Hey, Enabler, my story is believable, for me...

I'm sorry Paula! Please forgive me!

That is true Nuclear. I have to watch my back though because of her ability to travel to several long distance locations in a matter of minutes, remember the headlock.

And Paula I am truly sorry I know you would never shoot your friends even though I did say you were trying to help MB in a rounabout way. I will always have your back! After all I would really be completely lost without you Paula! Please forgive me, I'm begging!

Ah... she doesn't shoot her friends, but she's not above carving them up a bit with the old Ka-Bar if necessary. 

Walk carefully, Curtis...

Well, Curtis, Paula had mercy on your soul, you were lucky, this time.....muwhahahaha!

Hey, what's wrong with holes? I have several in my head now. When I put my finger over one hole and listen to the other hole, I can hear the ocean!

Curtis, MB just needs to make sure that whatever holes, where ever, won't leak anything important while he's listening to the ocean! 

MB can't afford to lose the one live brain cell he has left!

I thought it was somewhere between your legs, friend.  LOL