InsideTech

lol I should get paid for plugging that site the way I do

lol ummmmm what if I throw some chips in with it? bwahahahaha!

Tsk Tsk Tsk... you're making EXCUSES! That's why you're still single.  Sacrifice a little sleep.  It's worth it in the long run.  And your family may want to see you, but I'm sure they'd rather see you WITH someone, so don't worry so much about neglecting them.  This is something that you need to do for yourself, and they should understand that. 

I, too, have dated the crazies.  You couldn't IMAGINE the types I've been with.  Those people should just make you more determined to find the one you want to be with.  And back to the online dating: it cuts back on going out and looking for someone if you're doing it from the comforts of your own home.  Then, when you meet someone you want to go on a date with, THEN you can leave the house and forfeit a little sleep, all for the sake of love!

Okay, I'm prescribing you this: make a profile, get it set up, take a nap, check for messages, eat, sleep, go to work, and repeat.  At some point, sit on a park bench or something.  COME ON, MAN, I HAVE FAITH IN YOU!!!!!!! And I want updates!!!!!! Just remember, you can sleep when you're dead.  If you're going to sleep while awake, do you really want to do it alone? :)

<3

lol ummmmm what if I throw some chips in with it? bwahahahaha!

Hope the fish are coated in beer batter and deep fried...Hmmm Fish & Chips!

As for online dating it's fantastic, I met my wife on the...oh my god what am I saying...put down that keyboard and step away from the computer NOW !!!  Only joking.  Couldn't you kill two birds with one stone and tell your family that you'd be more likely to visit if they occassionally had good looking single sane women visiting them from time to time?  Personally I think Paula should start a matchmaking service, glo363 could be her first client.  And Paula, "Enny Meeny Minny Moe..." doesn't count as a partner selection strategy.

Thanks! Yes, I would.  I matched my cousin up with her husband and now they've been married nine years! How about them apples? :D

You don't pick people like that, smarty pants.  You filter them out through a process.  Don't want anyone over 30? Done.  Don't want a smoker? Done.  Want someone who likes baseball? Done! Someone who shares your ideals and future goals? Gotcha!

Thank you very much.  If you are looking for love, come to Paula! I'll mend your broken heart and find you everlasting love.  Well, I'll try, at least.

Love is grand.  Divorce is ten grand.  (If you're lucky)

lol

Yer darn tootin', Barry! But please, call me Paula.  Tony AKA Mr. Meanie Cleanie falls into a deadly rage whenever he sees the name "Beth".... lol

 I almost asked her if I could call her Beth, but I guess that answers that question.. heh

lol Glo, you can call me anything you want.  Just watch out for the big bald guy! Bwahahahaha!

Dear Frustrated,

Quit being a cheapskate! We all know you got money, so go to Eharmony.com and find a woman! lol And yes, if I get jilted, you're the shoulder I'll be leaning on.  MAYBE.  This Glo fella from Alabama's awfully cute.  You might have to watch him! lol  Love is out there, people.  Just like everything in life, there will be obstacles and road blocks.  Nothing is good in life if it's not worth fighting for! Just shake it off and step up.  Keep on moving, don't give up, and in the end, the reward will be well worth it!

Love,

Paula aka Paulabeth aka Beth aka Love Goddess aka DontPokeTheBearOrI'llThrowYouIntoGlass!

Paula, are you on commission?  First fish and then eHarmony.  They've just started advertising in the UK, ads are really cheesey.

You know what they say about men with big heads....

Iron deficiency or something like that.

Cheesy? They're beyond cheesy. And depressing as hell.

 Ok my sweet Goddess Doctor Beth,

eHarmony says they do not have any matches for me and expect me to pay for a subscription now so I can communicate with my 0 matches. hah

Future Grumpy-old-man in B'ham

Fellas, FELLAS!  Geez.  Eharmony was not a suggestion for you, dear Bama.  You are one of the elite.  Eharmony has no chance of finding someone who could fit your dreams and standards.  Barry, on the other hand, will take anything with curves and boobs. lol I'm just sayin'. :)

Don't be fooled by prospective fairy tales.  Life is rough.  Relationships are tough.  You're not going to have anything perfect, and if you expect that, you WILL be disappointed.  There WILL be sharp objects in relationships.  Just ask my guy.  He had to get five stitches Saturday because I pushed him off the couch and he landed on my drink glass.  Purely accidental, but this stuff happens.  Love is about FORGIVING someone's mishaps.  Now, if the sharp objects are whipped out and used to purposefully harm someone, that's when you skedaddle!!!!!!

Cmartin: eharmony does an indepth psychological exam on each client.  If you haven't tried it out, you missed out on the 29 pages of questions or whatnot.  I tried it, and they want to know everything.  It's insane.  I'm not saying someone can't and hasn't tricked the system to look less crazy.  I'm sure they have.  But you'll find crazy people anywhere you go - the bank, the store, the doctor's office.  So, with that being said, sometimes you gotta sift through the crazies. 

Jeff: You are bitter and angry.  I'm pretty sure we established that LONG ago! :) If a woman went through that much trouble to get away from you, she was either so hurt that she couldn't endure ever seeing your lovely face again, or you're a mental case with your own set of sharp objects. 

Barry (who's the craziest of them all): You don't have a woman because you're hung up on us tech girls!!!! Branch out!!!!!

Much love to you all

<3 Me

 Beth,

Your man is one lucky guy, stitches or not.. Do you have a sister, a similar friend, or maybe a clone? 

and Martin, it sounds like you have experience making yourself not sound psyco

I tried a dating agency when I was in Australia, mainly because I was only going to be there a few months commissioning a system at a power plant and thought it would be a good way to meet someone quickly  to see the sights with and have some fun and who knows maybe convince me to stay in Australia a little longer as the local office were keen to have me stay to support the system once commissioned.  Lets just say, after that one experience I would never ever use a dating agency again.  Nothing bad happened.  Just it was bloody expensive for the service they provided, half the numbers I was given hung up as soon as I mentioned the agencies name and the one girl I did hook up with just seemed intent on spending my money as quickly as possible.

To rub salt into the wound, on my last day at the power station one of the women in the step aerobics class I went to twice a week introduced me to an Irish teacher who had been working in Traralgon the whole time I'd been there and was single and looking for companionship.  Needless to say I was gutted, she was cute and Irish, what more could a man ask for.  So instead of seven months mainly seeing the sites on my own I could have been falling head over heals.  That's life I guess.

Beth,

You're right, probably can't clone perfection.. Guess that means I'm doomed to be a loney grumpy old man one day...

I don't think you really grasp how bad this girl actually rambled.. It was worse than anything I have seen, even those scenes in a crazy movie making fun of girls that talk too much didn't compare.. The sad part is she was aware of this problem and apologized for it constantly, but would go right back to it in an instant. It wouldn't have been so bad if she would just learn how to summarize her stories and not feel like she had to explain every detail.

Here's a VERY SHORT example.. "Let me tell you what Kelly said at work today. She came up to me and... Oh! she had these new shoes and they were so cute with the little strap thing. I want some so bad, but I can't find any I like on sale. I went to the mall the other day looking for some and saw this dress that I just had to have.. Oh, that reminds me about Cindy's dress she wore to church last week.. Was it last week? Maybe week before. What week was it you went up to your parents? Oh! let me tell you what my dad did last Friday. He was trying to light the grill and. Oh! my sister's best friend's cousin's husband just got a new grill, let me tell you about it. It is red.. Oh! I saw this red car today that looked so cute, it was one of those.. what do you call it? I don't know, but it looked fast. OMG, let me tell you about my horrible fast-food experience yesterday. This lady was so rude, speaking of rude, my boss had a problem today............."

Notice how each story leads to another one.. But don't worry, she never left a story un-done.. She'd always get back to each and every one so that you would know every detail of everything that happened.